"Use the radioactive ooze!"
Tuesday, February 9, 2010
-----Wonderful Words-------------------------
20 Wonderful Words Which Shouldn't be Allowed to Wither
There are many words these days that are rarely used – and that is a great shame as even the simple act of their enunciation can bring on a smile, such is their irrefragable brilliance. Go on, drop a few in to your next conversation and ensure their preservation. You are guaranteed to be the cynosure of attention and contesseration will be guaranteed. In other words you will be the life and soul of the party and make many friends.
Chaetophorous - You need a shave man – the dual roots of this word are ‘hairy’ and ‘bearing’.
Monday, February 8, 2010
----Valentine's Day Gift Ideas---------------------------------
From dispair.com we have BitterSweets. (Even though the website doesn't claim that these taste good, they are way better than conversation hearts. I really liked them when someone at work brought them in.)
For most, there is no crueler day of the calendar year than that of Valentine's Day. While a tiny fraction of the population can look forward to a holiday of wine and roses, poetry and song, the vast majority of us can anticipate a day of nausea and grimacing, trauma and grief. A day in which minutes seem like hours, and hours like days, as we reflect sorrowfully on yesteryear's romantic indignities, today's loneliness, and the unknowable but certain heartbreak that will be visited upon us repeatedly in the years to come.
When cruelty and holidays collide, the weak-willed find solace in self-pity and comfort foods. And now, Despair Inc. is pleased to announce that we've combined BOTH into a radical new offering. Introducing Bittersweets® - The Valentine's Candy for the Rest of Us.
Like the ubiquitous candy conversation hearts, Bittersweets® are made of flavored, chalky-tasting sugar and sport a message on their face. But unlike other candy hearts, ours are stamped with bitter musings and mockeries perfectly suited to the dejected spirits of those who will spend the holiday alone, or wishing they were. Messages recalling an almost forgotten, unbearably painful memory of being dumped. Or perhaps of a dysfunctional, psychotic ex-girlfriend or boyfriend. Or of that cruel-hearted girl (or boy) in elementary school who rejected your valentine solicitations, informing you that Jake (or Holly) was "so totally way hotter. "Now available in THREE unique collections- "Dejected", "Dysfunctional", and "Dumped"- with each featuring up to 37 unique sayings each!
Truly, Bittersweets® are the perfect gift for you OR for someone you love, especially if that special someone is one who doesn't want to hurt your feelings but just doesn't feel that way about you but still wants to be friends so they can torment you with stories about their crushes on someone who doesn't appreciate them like you do, can't love them like you can, and actually takes pleasure in corralling a herd of fawning "just friends" behind themselves as they indulge in one self-destructive relationship after another, with no hope of ever finding true love, despite an army of souls eager to lavish it upon them.
(You know what we're talking about.)
Supplies are limited. But the pain that accompanies them may not be. Available in six different flavors, including: Banana Chalk, Grape Dust, Nappy-Citric, You-Call-This-Lime?, Pink Sand and Fossilized Antacid.
BitterSweets - Dysfunctional
37 biting barbs for stirring up the bile in toxic relationships of all kinds, including
"NO FIX 4 DUMB",
"SUB PRIME",
"GAME ON TV",
"PAROLE IS UP!",
"RETURN TO PIT", and
"BOOTY INFL8N".
Bittersweets - Dumped
Dumped offers 37 brutal kissoffs including
"U LEFT SEATUP",
"BACK 2 KENNEL",
"I GOT SOBER",
"CELIB8 THX2U",
"CALL A 900#" and
"RUSSIAN BRIDE".
BitterSweets - Dejected
37 depressing sayings for those spending Valentine's Day alone and in a state of self-flagellation, including
"LOSS LEADER",
"SETTLE 4 LESS?",
"TABLE FOR 1",
"I CRY ON Q" and
"DIGNITY FREE".
-----Wonderful Words-------------------------
20 Wonderful Words Which Shouldn't be Allowed to Wither
There are many words these days that are rarely used – and that is a great shame as even the simple act of their enunciation can bring on a smile, such is their irrefragable brilliance. Go on, drop a few in to your next conversation and ensure their preservation. You are guaranteed to be the cynosure of attention and contesseration will be guaranteed. In other words you will be the life and soul of the party and make many friends.Verbigeration - We all know someone who is guilty of this, you know. It’s like, you know, when people repeat words or phrases almost, you know ad infinitum. You may also have experienced it in the workplace where Orwellian type ‘speaks’ are common in this day and age of political correctness gone mad. Missing you already.
Sunday, February 7, 2010
Thursday, February 4, 2010
-----Valentine's Day Gift Ideas---------------------------------
It says
"Breathe…engage your five senses, close your eyes and inhale deeply. Be in the present moment, notice the color of the chocolate, the glossy shine. Rub your thumb over the chocolate bar to release the aromas of smoked applewood bacon flirting with deep milk chocolate. Snap off just a tiny piece and place it in your mouth, let the lust of salt and sweet coat your tongue.
Mo's Bacon Bar: applewood smoked bacon + Alder wood smoked salt + deep milk chocolate, 41% cacao
3oz.
Consume within 6 months "
Wednesday, February 3, 2010
-----Valentine's Day Gift Ideas---------------------------------
Jacques Torres' Chocolate 
Kissing Game
Surprise your lover with champagne and chocolate - together in one sweet little package. Taittinger Rose Champagne unites with our signature chocolate to create a decadent and sensual treat. Every box contains an assortment of dark and milk chocolate kisses, each topped with an adorable "kiss" design! Under each delectable bonbon is a suggestion on where to kiss or be kissed. Get ready to grab your Valentine and pucker up!
Or maybe the spank me paddle cookie.... weird.
-----Wonderful Words----------------------------------------------
20 Wonderful Words Which Shouldn't be Allowed to Wither
There are many words these days that are rarely used – and that is a great shame as even the simple act of their enunciation can bring on a smile, such is their irrefragable brilliance. Go on, drop a few in to your next conversation and ensure their preservation. You are guaranteed to be the cynosure of attention and contesseration will be guaranteed. In other words you will be the life and soul of the party and make many friends.
Verbigeration - We all know someone who is guilty of this, you know. It’s like, you know, when people repeat words or phrases almost, you know ad infinitum. You may also have experienced it in the workplace where Orwellian type ‘speaks’ are common in this day and age of political correctness gone mad. Missing you already.
Tuesday, February 2, 2010
-----Valentine's Day Gift Options-----------------------------
Since Valentine's Day is coming up, I thought I'd provide readers with some gift ideas. First up a Heart Coffee Mug:
"Heart Mug (£12.21) designed by Reiko Kaneko. The handle and its printed shadow completes a heart, clever!
Made in Staffordshire, England"
Made in Staffordshire, England"
From Hidden Art Shop. Looks like a pretty cool site too!
-----Wonderful Words---------------------------------------------
20 Wonderful Words Which Shouldn't be Allowed to Wither
There are many words these days that are rarely used – and that is a great shame as even the simple act of their enunciation can bring on a smile, such is their irrefragable brilliance. Go on, drop a few in to your next conversation and ensure their preservation. You are guaranteed to be the cynosure of attention and contesseration will be guaranteed. In other words you will be the life and soul of the party and make many friends.
Agastopia - Do you like or admire a particular part of someone’s body – or for that matter that special place on bodies in general? Then that means that you are agastopic. Perhaps you can be relieved in one way – at least you have an alternative work to fetish at long last.
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